Do you have a hard time saying No to others. Learning to cultivate healthy boundaries is all about learning to say YES to yourself.
I am a recovering doormat, I have been bending over backwards to try and make my marriage work, it didn’t work, it never does!
I gave myself up completely, so that I had no idea who I was anymore.
It took me a while to learning to say No. I was afraid of retribution, of people getting angry with me or lashing out.
My first time I said No was so lovely, that I realized it is ok to say No.
I remember it was many years ago, and there was a parent evening, and another Mom asked me, whether she can drive with me. I said yes, as it is wonderful to have company on your way. Then she said, but she will be later, and I felt, but I want to be on time. I made up excuses in my head, that I am showing I am a good friend, that it will be nice to have company etc. Then she mentioned that she will go back with her husband, and I felt, but I have no parking spot, coming late, then I have to walk so far to fetch my car alone plus I truly want to be on time.
So I told her, that I am happy to take her along, if she is at my place by 6pm, as I truly want to be there on time.
She replied, that is ok, she will go in her own car as she can’t come earlier.
I was so shocked how easy it was.
Learning to listening within, what we want, what is right for ourselves is key.
We are so trained to tune into others, and do what is good for them, we completely lost sense for self, and what would be good for us.
Remember, when you say yes to someone else, make sure you are not saying No to yourself. A quote from Louise Hay and or Paulo Cuello.
This was the sentence that got me thinking and changed my life.
Finally I was able to set up healthy boundaries,
plus create my birthday the way I wanted to, not the way it was supposed to be for others.
You deserve only the best.
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My gorgeous 1 on 1 program is helping you to learn so much about yourself, Heal your past, Open Your Heart, Prioritize Yourself and Empower yourself.
Heart & Soul
Learn more about healthy boundaries in our latest episode of Heart and Soul. Janet Groom and I are sharing about Healthy Boundaries and how we learned to say YES TO US.
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