Welcome back to the insights of my deeply healing journey around the United States of America

If you have missed the beginning of my trip, you can read up here:

Deeply Healing Journey Part 1

Deeply Healing Journey Part 2

Enjoy the continuation and last bit of our journey!

 

New Orleans

New Orleans is another new place for me, a city I’ve always wanted to visit. I loved how they celebrate life. We saw a wedding parade, and it was so amazing, so cheerful and lovely.

I just could not stop myself from dancing to the music I heard all around us.

New Orleans taught me to be in my own rhythm, allow my own music to play along to the tune of life, improvise as I go, lay back, and just have fun.

New Orleans is known as the Big Easy. It’s laid back attitude, reminding me to see the fun in life is the lessons I got here. I saw that I take my life far too seriously and lose the fun side of it. So take a step back, enjoy the ease in life, and allow yourself to have more fun.

Visiting a battlefield was impressive and I was able to be a clear channel, releasing lot of pent up pain and allowing the love to flow into the earth too, while not be affected, myself, by the pain. I love my work and apply it wherever I go. I think I learnt to LIVE my purpose which is all we are asked for, right?

It’s OK to be tired – for all of us, and also for me, holding it all together.

Teenagers might not tolerate heat and humidity that well either, I learnt

What the kids loved most about New Orleans: visiting a battlefield.

What I loved most was the ease of life, and the laid back way of living.

Orlando

When I left New Orleans, I realized I was NOT in the flow. Checking in took too long, our suitcases were too heavy, I could not find a decent breakfast, I was hungry, grumpy and tired and worn out. I sat at the gate and could have wept, alas, for all the people around me, I did as I usually do, held back my tears.

When we arrived in Orlando, I realized it was high time for some self-care. Traveling with my three kids, organizing everything, being on top of it all, making sure they packed, the transfers met us, I had all the documents we needed, etc. was really taking a toll on me. I was exhausted. I learnt that I could exhaust myself even while doing something I love. It was time to integrate some self-care into the trip.

The kids were due to visit Universal Park. I thought I had to go with them and just sit in the park and wait for them to go on all the fun rides; however, as my oldest is 19, I did not need to accompany them, and I took a day off.

Yes, I could do my thing, instead of sitting in the heat among a horde of people just waiting for them to be done. WOW!

I booked some spa treatments and was really looking forward to some me time. I was so guided to take this time for myself, and loved how the Universe was sending me signs.

Just booking the appointments made me feel lighter and more at ease.

However, the next morning my youngest had a headache, and I was not sure if he was feverish. He said he wanted to go to the park and I let him. I felt guilty for the older ones, having to look after a sick child, and also about enjoying myself when my youngest did not feel well in the park. However, he knew it was his only chance to ride the roller coasters.

I had a good talk with him. He told me on the way down from the room that he wanted to go with his older siblings so I could go to the spa! This is what an empathetic child will do: keeping you happy and holding up the mirror.

I talked to him and told him he didn’t need to sacrifice himself for me. He could stay in the room if he preferred. Going on roller coasters won out but left me wondering if I should have been allowed to enjoy the spa while one of my kids wasn’t feeling too well.

In short, all went well. Horatio had a lot of fun and did not get sick at all. I restored myself in the spa after having left instructions with the kids to contact the spa if necessary. I also felt that if my son turned worse, it was even more important for me to recharge when I had the chance, so I could help him, and be more patient and more nurturing than I would have been were I running on low energy.

I was reminded about how much I gave up throughout my life -especially during motherhood – and how often I forgot to look after myself and how I kept running on very low energy.

It was definitely time to Heal

Have some Fun

And Play

And also to learn new things and new ways of life, setting myself first is still hard, but I can do this. My kids are not babies anymore. I feel like an important step has been taken.

 

 

Reach for the moon and stars in your life, was the inspiration I got visiting the Kennedy Space Centre.

Self-care is necessary, and it is awesome to integrate some into my daily routine before I get to the point of feeling the tears coming up from pure exhaustion.

Trust the Universe and trust that my kids are capable and awesome.

Let go of the need to constantly be on top of my kids and control their lives.

I am allowed to do my own thing and it is wonderful that we could all spend a day doing the things we loved on our separate paths.

It was good to have privacy and time for myself, feeling like a deep breath could be taken, allowing myself to fill up on love and self-care.

Being pampered, I felt like a princess. How can you treat yourself so that you can feel like a princess? I will be looking into this question in my daily life: What helps me feel like a princess?

Recharging at any given moment is so essential.

Lift off and enjoy following your dreams. What aim can you set for yourself?

Be proud of yourself and celebrate your life. You are achieving so much.

Follow your dreams.

I did some card readings for myself and found the perfect answers. It is an amazing practice and something you can do for yourself, too. I love the card apps, as they are easy to use while on the go.

What my kids loved best: roller coasters and Kennedy Space Center (more the boys)

What I loved best: learning to look after myself, allowing myself to recharge and doing my separate thing while the kids enjoyed their fun

 

Miami

I love the beach life and swimming in the ocean. It is so healing on a very deep level. Finally… time to relax.

Allow it all in, swim in the warm sea and just enjoy the time being, without much going on.

Of course, we visited the Everglades. It was so peaceful and so intriguing, too.

I learnt a lot about alligators and felt the inspiration of walking my own path, finding my own way around things or through things, like the Miccosukee adapted to life in the Everglades.

My inspiration came back, and having recharged, I felt more at ease and could enjoy our last days in America a lot.

Also, the kids were more at peace. It showed me that we all mirror each other, and the more at peace I am, the less the kids are irritating me with fights

What the kids loved best: visiting the everglades and touching alligators.

What I loved best: swimming in the ocean and just being.

 

And back in Zurich

We were traveling back home. To be honest, I did not miss the cooking or laundry (though I did some laundry from time to time, as we did not have clothes for 5 weeks in our suitcases).

It was good for each of us to look forward to our own room, to enjoying some privacy, and yes, not having to live out of a suitcase any longer was great.

We finished up the last packing of our suitcases, making sure we had everything and hoping the luggage wouldn’t be too heavy

Then a night flight home.

When we got back, we petted our cat and checked on our tortoises. We aired the house and yes, unpacked, did laundry, put things away, but somehow kept the ease and holiday feel a bit longer.

 

I decided that I will set aside some time each morning to tap into the easy of life feeing, the knowing in my heart, to find inspiration, and to ask the kids to help me with the household chores.

Vacation is a feeling within me, a resource I can tap into any time I’d like. In a way, being at home does not mean that vacation time is over, vacation is in my heart and I can tap into that feeling by embracing all I learnt on that wonderful journey and integrating it into my daily routine. Breathing it all in on a daily basis will be awesome.

How can you be more at ease in your own home and find a way to have a mini-vacation each day?

 

I will be writing more about what I learnt in upcoming blog posts

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Warmest of hugs,

Caroline

Full Moon Release

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Full Moon Release

Wednesday, April 6th marked the 22nd anniversary of my father’s passing.

April 6, 1994, was a very painful day for me. (You can read more on the stages of grief I went through in my blog post ‘Our Souls are eternal‘)

 

It has been 22 years

I thought I had dealt with all my grief and that 22 years would have been enough time to leave it all behind. The Universe had something different in mind, however. Whereas the anniversary day itself passed without issue, I remembered that on that day 22 years ago, my father passed. It was ok.

Thursday was another story, though. When I woke up in the morning, I felt sad. I browsed through my photo book and selected a picture I loved of my Dad and me (still a baby) and felt the urge to honour him, so I posted the photo on my Facebook page.

 

Seeing the love in my father’s eyes

Looking at that picture, seeing the love in my father’s eyes – how he looked at me and how he held me – the tears just flowed.

For the first time in a very, very long time, I just let go. I was too tired to hold it all together any longer. I was too drained in doing it all on my own.

I missed my Dad. I missed having a man by my side, and I missed a simple hug or being held like my Dad held me in his lap when I was just a tiny baby.

 

Letting it all go

It felt so good to let it all go, to let the tears stream down my face. It felt so relieving to just let it all go and wash away.

I tried to keep up my usual routine of posting on social media and putting my blog post online. Every now and then, though, I just let another wave of deep-rooted pain wash over me. I fell to my knees and cried my eyes out. It felt good. I never felt good crying, however, this time, it just felt so liberating, so healing.

 

Time to heal has come

I knew the time had come to heal old wounds. Deeply rooted pain had been coming up, and it was the time to look at it and let it all go.
It just happened. I did not force myself to cry, and I didn’t force myself to stop either. I could have easily pushed it all down again, telling myself that I am too old to cry, or that after 22 years there was no reason to be sad about my father’s passing.

 

Allowing the wave of grief wash over me

I could have been cruel and bossy with myself; however, I have grown into a passionate and gentle woman who allows herself time to heal.

I was there, letting the waves of pain wash over me. I allowed myself to feel lonely. I allowed myself to miss my Dad.

I also realised that I wasn’t only mourning my Dad, but also my ex-husband and other men in my life who had left me.

 

Signs

While crying and listening to Adele’s new album, I heard her sing

‘Hello From The Other Side’

and I buckled again, sobbing deeply.

I knew it was a sign, a sign that my father was saying hello from the other side, and letting me know he is around me.

While I cried I felt cared for,

while I sobbed I felt deeply loved,

while I sniffled I felt hugged and understood.

 

 

Most amazing moment

I cannot even express what happened when I let it out. It was the most amazing moment. I felt good. Even though I was crying, I felt like a huge boulder was lifted off my shoulders, like a dark cloud had been lifted.

It was amazing.

 

I allowed myself to feel the pain

I could finally allow myself to look into the abyss of my pain. For the first time, I acknowledged how hard it all had been, and I felt free because I no longer had to hold it all together.

Oh yes, I was glad that my kids were at school, as otherwise I could not have allowed myself to grieve properly.

I felt nurtured, and I knew that a new deep connection to the center of my soul had been established.

 

Nurturing Soul Sisters

I was happy to share my experience with my soul sisters in Karina’s Circle (KarinaLadet.com), and felt so nourished, understood, and supported.

They all knew I was on the right path, and none said anything implying that I was being silly. They knew that healing takes time, and they were just there for me, holding me in my pain and allowing me to move on in my own time.

 

Watching a movie

The evening held another big release. My youngest, Horatio, and I watched the movie, ‘Father Of The Bride,’ and I remembered how my father walked me down the aisle (on November 20^th, 1993) only 5 months before his passing. I saw how he must have felt, giving his oldest daughter away, and I remembered how nervous he was.

I cried more and more during the movie. My son did not really understand, but he is used to me crying during movies and at weddings.

 

My father loves me

I learnt again that my father loved me, and still loves me from the other side. The pictures of the two of us – when I was a baby or young child – show the love bond we shared. Maybe that loving bond wasn’t so easy to see during my teenage years.

Who knows? Maybe he held on to the role of a strict father too much, or maybe he was not able to show his love clearly, or maybe I expected too much, or that his love had to come in a certain form, which kept me from seeing that it was there all along, bright and clear.

You can read more about life with my father in my blog post ‘Through The Eyes Of A Child‘.

How liberating is it, to really understand that my Dad loved me.

 

Comments on my picture

The love was obvious in the picture I posted, as so many people commented on how they can see the love in his eyes, and also how similar I looked to him, which made me proud. I know he was also an Introvert and had trouble dealing with large crowds of people.

 

I am loved

What a wonderful feeling! Do you know what? During all that grief and crying, I reconnected with my own love deep within.

I had a lovely and restful sleep and woke up very peaceful. I felt a peace and warmth around me, I felt nurtured, but still very vulnerable.

I loved being vulnerable, though. I loved how I felt deeply cleansed and fresh.

I knew some profound healing had taken place, and I was shining in my colours again.

 

Embracing Vulnerability

Being vulnerable was empowering. I really opened up some more to the woman I am deep within.

It felt like a crisp, fresh, new day/life was about to begin. I embraced it and embraced my vulnerability and just felt like putting a blanket around myself and basking in that new energy.

Like breathing in that gentleness.

Like staying in that very, very peaceful energy, and accepting everything.

I let the waves of grief wash over me and I came out stronger and deeply cleansed on the other side.

What a relief! What a feeling! I am in awe.

 

Grief and pain come in waves and layers

Yes, I was finally ready to grieve and release properly. You can’t really schedule that level of healing in. It comes when it comes – when you have done enough inner work. When it does come, just be there embrace it. Let it wash over you, and allow it to happen.

Grief has no expiration date. Do not let anybody else tell you otherwise.

Remember to allow your grief whenever it comes up, and allow the layers to peel off one after another.

Even though we know our loved ones who have passed are close by in spirit and soul, we still miss them.

Warmest of hugs to you all.

In a new gentleness,

Caroline

What can you do when you lose something?

The other day when I was in town, I suddenly realised that I had lost my little angel figurine from my key chain.

I was sad. I loved that little Angel. It was so beautiful – carved out of amber and I felt it guided me along. It also held a special meaning for me, as I got it from a dear friend.

After I lost the little angel, however, I immediately realised that someone was meant to find an Angel that day. I knew I lost that Angel so someone else would be able to find some guidance and uplift their spirit by finding my little lost Angel. Someone needed the reassurance from the Angels more than I did.

I was happy to be of service, and I gladly said goodbye to my little Angel. It had served me so well and now it would serve someone else well for a while.

Some things are only meant for a certain time – I know that. The only constant in life is change, and we have to be flexible and adaptable enough.

Holding on to things that no longer serve us will only hurt us.

Losing that Angel brought that all home. I could have sat there for hours, contemplating, “Oh where did I lose it? Why didn’t I check it better?” I could have walked back all the way I came; I could have done a million things, but they probably would not have brought this Angel back to me.

The knowledge that my time with this Angel had come to an end, and that this beautiful Angel was going to serve someone else was very comforting.

When we walk the path trusting that everything has a higher reason, we can be happier. We are free of self-blame and worry. We just know that the things that happen are meant to be – there is a higher reason for it, and all is well.

Have you ever lost something? How do you still feel about it?

If you find yourself being sad or mad about something you’ve misplaced, you can ask Archangel Michael to help you release pain and sorrow, then you can ask Archangel Raphael to send green healing light to you so you can heal from your loss. I also usually have Mother Mary help me release the pain from my heart.

I explain the little exercises in this video, enjoy

 

The work with Mother Mary can be followed by asking the Angels to pour beautiful pink soothing light all around me.

You can sit quietly and let the Angel show you what a gift you have brought to the world. Know deep down in your heart that all is well, and this needed to happen for a reason unknown to you.

How do you feel now?

Of course, this method can also be applied to grief when a loved one has passed into the light. If you feel the grief still, know that your loved one is well, and his/her time was up. There was nothing more that you could have done, and nothing would have changed the outcome.

When you are grieving, ask Archangel Azrael to help you with your grief, and to help elevate the pain. Archangel Azrael can also help you to connect with your loved one’s soul. Maybe you can sense him/her around for a while.

Always thank the Angels for their help, and remember, that a grateful heart is always full.

I wish you all a wonderful day…

May peace and trust be with you,

and remember to talk to your Angels.

Warm hugs,

Caroline

PS: Next week I will hold my Workshop ‘Verschönere Dein Leben mit Erzengel Jophiel’ in Adliswil, Thursday 28th at 7pm, would love to see you there.

If you missed out on my online Webinar ‘Beautify Your Life with Archangel Jophiel,’ you can download it now from my Healing Shop.